Ash nazg.

Told him I was re-reading The Fellowship of the Ring. He said, ‘Grow up, LOL.’

I haven’t met any kid who reads the Lord of the Rings before, though. So ah, which part of reading the trilogy is childish, actually? I didn’t ask him that, though. Malas. And let’s say reading LOTR is really childish, I still don’t want to grow up anyway. I don’t want to grow out of the fondness of it, at least. What makes you think telling someone to grow up isn’t a childish thing to do?

I believe he hasn’t read even one page from the whole trilogy. Wouldn’t have thought it was childish to read it in the first place if he has. Macam baca buku teks Sejarah, tahu? Adik engkau umur 3 tahun sudah baca buku teks Sejarah ya?

I like everything LOTR. Every single thing. And it pisses me off to be told that I should grow up when you’re the one who is speeding backwards. Pft.

And I think you should grow up, first; out of the mindset that epic-lovers are childish and lawyers who can’t differentiate between arak and sparkling jus epal are not, for a start. At least I know they don't even look the same.

OK. Teacher Nani emo. Balik blog masing-masing sekarang.

FANG untuk Kak Nani II.

I’d say the person who knows me best after God, is my mum. Or Maak, fondly. And I’d say the person who knows me best after Maak, is my sister – the one and only. I’m thankful for that; for having people like that in my life. Not everyone has the luxury of the people who know you so close you’d be happy just knowing that they remember you. I do. Alhamdulillah.

Last few days, my sister did something which sent my soul off the roof into the stars, haha. Remember this post? Yeah, as most of you might have guessed, one copy of James Patterson’s Fang is now ours. Awesomeness. Hehe. You can read her version of the story right here. Couldn’t really tell you how happy I am. But I do have many bunga api of a hundred colours raging my brains right now. Haha.

I’m happy that she got the book for me. But I’m happier that the person who got it for me was her. There were some other people who offered to help buy it for me, but I said no because I knew it wouldn’t be the same. I don’t trust anyone’s observation of a book before buying. I trust only mine. And since the madness of ‘Aku mesti beli buku yg sempurna segala-galanya’ has been successfully acquired by my sister, from me, I trust hers - thus the reason why I jumped out of my skin the moment she texted me about the purchase.

But truly, I’m happiest knowing that it wasn’t much of the ways she chooses a book or the time she spent for something I wanted that sent me off the roof, it was the fact that the blood-sister whose heart is the prettiest after Maak’s had actually remembered to put a smile on my face by buying a book that did it. She could have done bigger things, and crazier things, but she chose to put a smile on my face. For that alone I could never thank Allah SWT enough.

Thanks, adikku yang best. Thanks for the beautiful thought. You’re the world’s best sister to me, and if there are people who don’t agree, they might have been absent the day God distributed brains.

*hugs*

Sumpah annoying.

CLICK SINI.

This is THE MOST ANNOYING SONG I've ever heard! What the heck is Kawaii no Kawaii?? Who taught the lyricist Nihongo? And what's with the oh-so-annoying pronunciation!?

Schoumeylnya hensetku ini! Tapi ku da ta tahan lllagi! Asyik na bedewring-dewring! Oh God.

The L pronunciation in the word 'lagi' sounds like she has a tongue way bigger than her mouth could hold. The word 'henset' (she pronounced it as haeset) sent goosebumps up my spine (it's THAT annoying!). The R sound she profusely induced with the W sound to send out the 'Aku Melayu bersebutan orang putih walaupun aku bawak imej Jepun-konon', ew! - did you guys read the newspaper a few days back? She claimed to be styling herself Horojuku-ly when the fact is Horojuku freaking DOES NOT exist and it's Harajuku-lah smart-ass!

Anime fans, kalau kamu perasan - the kawaii no kawaii *muntah* part sounded just like the first line from Ichigo Mashimaro's opening. And the dawri pagi hingga petang and dawri petang hingga malllam *muntah lagi* lines in the 1st and 2nd verses sounded exactly like the first line in Haruhi Suzumiya's ending. Copycat! Benci!

Argh.

Entah apa-apa!

Cuba my readers pulak try (redundant lagi). Manalah tau, kot-kot bagi kamu tak annoying. Pfft.

Senarai Tindakan-tindakan Bodoh

Perkara-perkara yang Teacher Nani rasa layak masuk Senarai Tindakan-tindakan Bodoh yang Sering Remaja Perempuan Melayu Zaman Sekarang Buat.

Keluar shopping mintak izin BF. Tak dapat izin, tak shopping. Kesian BF engkau, tak pasal-pasal kena berlakon jadi suami.

Nak beli subang silver RM16 saja pun mesti MMS gambar subang tersebut untuk dapat approval BF. Macamlah guna duit dia kan?

Tak berkawan dengan orang lain dalam male species atas alasan setia-membabi-buta-tuli kat BF dan melarang BF engkau berkawan dengan perempuan lain. Kalau dia pasang 12 pun engkau boleh cakap apa, heh? Kalau engkau isteri pun tak boleh buat apa kalau dia tamak mau pasang 4.

Makan yang dibenarkan oleh BF saja. Ayam goreng tak boleh, nanti BF malu ada GF gemuk. Kesian. Tak merasalah engkau ayam goreng berempah best Teacher Nani.

Pakai tudung masa dating sebab BF suruh, masa lain bogel kepala. Apa pasal engkau tak sembah je BF engkau tu sehari 5 kali?

Terus cemas macam perempuan belum kawin tapi tak datang bulan kalau BF tak datang fetch nak pergi mana-mana. Tak pernah dengar tentang kewujudan bas kah?

Sambil berjalan-jalan mesti bergayut di badan BF macam monyet tak pernah jumpa pokok. Engkau memang tak pernah hadir pada setiap hari yang ada subjek Pendidikan Islamkah masa sekolah dulu?

Add semua perempuan dalam FB friends list BF. Macamlah kalau dia curang tu akan kantoi di FB. Entah apa-apa.

Tak makan seminggu sebab nak reload credit untuk bergayut tanpa wayar pula dengan BF. Selfless tak bertempat sambil membebankan financial orang lain kena bagi engkau pinjam duit pulak.

Balik dating salam cium tangan BF. Cium pipi juga time rasa-rasa Tuhan tak nampak tu kan? Gila tinggi ah taraf BF engkau. Macam mak bapak engkau dah jadinya, kan? Bagus.

Camwhoring bersama BF dengan berpakaian macam orang zaman batu lepas tu upload kat FB dengan caption ‘Sweet tak?’ dan mengamuk macam gajah naik minyak bila orang tegur pasal aurat engkau.

Dan ambil gambar bogel sendiri untuk di-MMS kepada BF dengan caption ‘Your baby’ dengan penuh keyakinan yang perbuatan itu tak apa selagi dia menganggap engkau bayinya. Macam ayah engkau tengok engkau masa baru lahir dulu lah bukan?


Readers, kamu ada lagi nak tambah?


p/s: Tajuk memang sengaja jadi redundant.

To cut the car in front.

Actually, my father wanted to cut the car in front of us. But the timing was not good and there was a rubbish lorry coming to us really fast like dying. So my father just twisted the steering wheel and our car accidentally went back into the square!

Sebenarnya ayah saya nak potong kereta di depan. Tapi salah bajet masa lepas tu ada pulak lori sampah dari depan laju nak mampus. Jadi ayah saya pulas stereng dan kereta kami pun terbalik masuk petak (sawah)!

***

Right. I love my job. I can’t remember the number of times I’d reminded my kids at school to think in English and not direct translate when they speak or write. I know I’m gonna have to keep doing that for as long as I’m teaching, but this? Come on. The grammar was almost perfect. But the direct translation – man, I need someone to pinch me real hard. I can’t stop laughing. God.

No, seriously – I wasn’t condescending (for those who think so and wanted write a nasty comment to me about it, you’re advised to leave. I don’t entertain emo fags). Kids are cute. They make mistakes and aren’t ashamed of them, that’s cute. I appreciate their courage. Their efforts. Those are some of the most important things – of the things that are keeping me sane right now. Yeah. If you think being a real teacher isn’t going to drive you out of your mind, don’t become one. Oblivion doesn’t help in the said profession.

A doctor friend once asked me, what’s it like to be in a classroom? I told him the truth; that for me, it has always been fun, Alhamdulillah.

You’re a doctor. If I were to picture it for you, it would look exactly like this: You’re placed in a room full of at least 25 patients, all of them of different needs, diseases, injuries and handicaps, some of them don’t even want to be there while there are others who don’t even care if they’re there or not, some don’t even know what their problems are, some refuse to be treated, some fear treatment and some don’t even need treatment but just motivation – and you have to tend to all of them at once in at least forty minutes with everything you have – which is of course, not much.

And he didn’t think that would be fun.

That’s why I’m the one with the markers and textbooks, not you.

I love my job. And I love my kids. I wouldn’t trade this job I have for any other job in the world. But truthfully if it pays at least ten times better and offers me the same amount of satisfaction every time I drive home feeling tired and faint, I’d consider it. I don’t think there ever will be a job like that, though.

So I’ll just stick to mine – loving and educating and be happy with the blessings.

So, how are you, people?